Sex is an important part of a romantic relationship in most cases – whether you do it a little or a lot is up to you as a couple.

But, when one member of a couple starts to want sex less then it can become a cause of tension.

And, often a lower libido can be caused by changes in hormones, stress and plenty of other valid reasons.

However, if you’ve started to dread sex with your partner it can be a worrying and unpleasant time.

Luckily, if you’ve found yourself making excuses to avoid sex, but want to want it again then there are solutions to be found.

If you don’t want to have sex then you don’t ever have to, but you need to talk about that too.

Want to get your libido back? Try these tips...
Want to get your libido back? Try these tips…

Sex expert Tracey Cox told the Daily Mail that to get your mojo back you’ll need to sort out any problems in the relationship first – as sex and love are often interwoven.

Then, make sure you see the doctor to check whether there’s anything wrong – especially if there’s pain or discomfort while having sex.

Differing sex drives can drive a wedge between you
Differing sex drives can drive a wedge between you

You also need to tackle your lifestyle if you’re too tired to have sex – stop smoking, cut down on booze, get more sleep, eat healthily and exercise.

After that, there are a number of things you can do to re-boot your sex drive.

Feel more body confident

Sex, intimacy and relationship coach, Duchess Iphie said: “The most important thing to remember is that to truly improve and enjoy your sex life, there should be body confidence, sexual confidence and an intimate connection with your partner.

“This will guarantee a great, loving, passionate and mind-blowing sex life no matter your age.”

She recommends practicing yoga, kegels and strength training.

Improve your health to see if this will kick start your desire
Improve your health to see if this will kick start your desire

Have more sex

Expert, Tracey, claims that getting back in the sack will improve your body image and confidence which can help in the long run.

Work out what still works

If something once worked to get you aroused, but now doesn’t then point it out.

Tracey said: “If you don’t enjoy sex when you have it, why would you want to do it?

“Our bodies change as we move through life. Our tastes change.

“Have an honest conversation and fill each other in. “

Figure out the ideal conditions

Tracey claims you should look for what your ideal setting would be.

Whether its in the morning, after a few drinks, on the sofa or while listening to music, figure out your favourite way to do the deed.

Get warmed up

She also suggests masturbating, reading erotica, watching porn or getting out a toy.

Be open and honest with eachother
Be open and honest with eachother

Tracey explained: “If you’re on your own, go for it – just don’t take yourself through to orgasm.

“If you’re not, take yourself off to the bathroom and do whatever you can get away with.

“Do this and you’re starting sex ‘warm’ not cold.”


Tracey noted: “You don’t fancy your partner but you sure as hell do your boss? Your partner can’t mind-read.

“Let your imagination run as wild as it wants to, with whoever it wants to.”

After all – your partner is benefiting in the long run.

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Have sex before you go out

If you get too tired, bloated or full after a night out for sex then plan ahead.

Especially, if you think the idea will hang over your head and ruin the night.

Tracey recommends having a glass of wine and a quickie before you leave.

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