The power of manifestation means you can have anything you put your mind to. But what if you’re focusing your mind on the wrong thing, or worse, the wrong person?
We’ve all been there. Hoping and wishing for a text from a special person, visualizing your future with your crush, or chanting affirmations to attract someone into your life.
The Law Of Attraction, when used correctly, can transform your life for the better. However, if you have your heart, and your manifestations, set on someone in particular, you could be causing serious damage in your love life.
You might think you know exactly who “the one” is for you but it’s possible you’re just getting sidetracked.
Keeping your heart and manifestations open means focusing on attracting love and romance in general rather than focusing on attracting love and romance with a specific person.
It might come as a surprise to you that your ex or crush that you have imagined your future life with is NOT the person the universe will send your way.
Your manifestations could be driving your crush away.
To learn more about how to use — and misuse — manifestation in your love life, we spoke exclusively to Kristine Carlson, a psychic medium who has expertise in love readings, soul realignment, and — of course — manifestation.
“First of all that’s sort of affecting their free will in a way,” Carlson says as a warning against trying to manifest someone into your love life.
In the same way that you’re using manifestation to channel your own wants, the person you’re manifesting has their own path and desires. Forcefully inserting them into your journey is not only difficult to do, it could be the exact opposite of what they want for themselves.
That’s not to say that your crush wants nothing to do with you. Maybe you’ll get lucky and they’ve also been manifesting you. But if not, seeking to control others can seriously backfire.
You might be missing out on your perfect match.
Then there is the reality that you could accidentally manifest the wrong kind of love into your life. Think about: out of all the 7 billion people on the planet how can you be truly sure this person is the one for you?
Carlson tells us, “By trying to manifest a specific person you could be blocking a better love from coming your way.”
There’s a huge difference between manifesting want you need and manifesting what you think you need, and by shutting yourself off to the possibility that there is a better love out there with someone else, you could be making a crucial error.
“We don’t always see what is best for us,” says Kristine, “By doing that it can block someone better for you and keep you in a vicious cycle.”
Attracting the wrong type of energy may serve your short-term interests but, in the long run, you could end up causing yourself more pain.
So, how do you manifest the right kind of love?
If you’ve got an idea of how you want to find love and who you want that love to be with, it can be difficult to let that go.
But as Carlson says, “Focusing on just one person can cause blinders for you and completely block out the right person.”
Opening your energy up to more possibilities can help you release the rigid idea of love that you’ve created for yourself.
Focus more on the qualities you want in a partner, or try visualizing the life you want together. Maybe even let go entirely and trust the universe will deliver the right match instead of the match you think you want.
Carlson recommends manifesting what is best, not who is best. “It’s best to work on manifesting the best possible one for you in that moment and to be open,” she says, “Don’t block out anyone that is better for you!”
Alice Kelly is a writer living in Brooklyn, New York. She is a generalist with an interest in lifestyle, entertainment, and trending topics.